The kind of adoption you choose can shape the future relationship you may have with your child.
If you're considering adoption, you may wonder if your child will want a relationship one day. While every situation is unique, many adopted children in modern-day adoptions grow to have a deep love and appreciation for their birth parents — and a key reason why is open adoption.
A child in a semi-open or closed adoption may know very little about you, whereas a child in an open adoption may have grown up with you in their life.
In this article, we’ll explore how adopted children may feel about their biological parents and how open adoption can benefit the child in the long run. If you’re ready to learn more about your options, reach out to us by filling out our contact form or calling or texting us at 608-821-8221.
How Do Adopted Children Feel About Their Biological Parents?
Every child and adoption story is different, so your child’s feelings may vary. They may even change over time as they grow up and experience new things.
“Knowing her better, I can better appreciate the decision that she made, and it’s been helpful filling in the blanks of my personal history and what makes me ‘me,’” said Jennifer, an adoptee.
Here are some common emotions adopted children feel:
Love
Contentment
Happiness
Gratitude
Pride
Sadness
Anger
Insecurity
Loss
If you want to build a relationship with your child after the adoption, it’s important to go at their pace. Being there for them, whether that’s now or years down the line, allows you to answer their questions and have meaningful conversations when they’re ready.
“[My birth parents] have always made it very clear that they love me, and they’ve always had a positive and present role in my life,” said Diana, an adoptee. “They made an incredibly tough call, but it opened up a lot of opportunities for all of us, and that’s something I’ve always respected.”
Are Open Adoptions Better for the Child?
In the past, adoptions were usually closed. This meant that birth parents and adoptive families didn’t stay in touch, and the details of the adoption were kept private. Adoption was often surrounded by stigma, with many people believing that separation was best for the child.
Over time, however, perceptions shifted. Research revealed the benefits of maintaining some form of contact, and open adoptions have since become more common. Today, most adoption agencies encourage open adoptions because of the positive effects.
How Does Open Adoption Affect the Child? [4 Benefits]
Research shows that open adoption can be beneficial for everyone involved — especially the child. Here are some of the unique benefits it can offer your baby:
1. Stronger Sense of Identity
An open adoption can help your child develop a grounded sense of who they are. Knowing their birth parents and family history can provide a foundation for them to feel secure in their identity.
2. Confident in Their Adoption Story
Children in open adoptions grow up knowing their adoption stories and feeling comfortable with them. They have answers to questions they may otherwise wonder about, which helps them feel at ease when talking about their background.
3. Access to Their Medical History
If you’re part of your child’s life, they’ll have access to important medical information. This knowledge can be invaluable as they grow up and face health decisions related to genetics.
4. Two Loving Families
Children in open adoptions know they’re loved not just by their adoptive families, but also by their birth families. This unique family dynamic can give them a sense of support and belonging.
Is Open Adoption Confusing for Kids?
Open adoption isn’t confusing for kids. When a child grows up with open adoption as a normal part of their life, it becomes just another unique aspect of their story. Other children might have one or two parents, but they have both birth parents and adoptive parents. Rather than causing confusion, this family structure can actually make them feel special.
Choosing Adoption for Your Child
Adoption is a deeply personal decision, and it’s normal to worry about your child’s future feelings. You may not be sure what to do. What matters most is that you’re making the best choice for you and your baby.
Open adoption can give your child a bright future while keeping the door open for a meaningful relationship. If you want to learn more about your adoption options, reach out today by filling out our contact form or calling or texting us at 608-821-8221.
